Long time no blog

It's been a solid year and a half since i've ventured to this website. But i'm here, and i think i could use a little blog entry. I just read all my old blogs, and while re-reading them, i realized i'm not a half bad writer. lol I was interested in myslef, which is odd. I saw the old Perrin prompts, and man, good times. Talk about getting that little mind stretched! But anyway. I think i could use a talk about some things. Since we've met last, i broke up with that girl, long story, you don't wanna hear it. And then took a break and got a new one. Name's Kaitlyn. To make a long story short, she told me she was gonna break up with me for no apparent reason. Which sucks. Soo i'm kinda just living in the unreasonable doubt that she has the ability to throw out the break up words at any point in time. It's not a fun thing to do. I don't like waiting, i'd much rather her just be like "Ayyo we over" or "omg no i'd never break up with you" but neither seem to be happening, so i'll chill the in the between, to my own dismay. It feels good to write stuff. Well type, but yeah. I haven't done this is in a good long while, i think a conversation with myself has been long overdue. Naw i'm sayin? I've changed, flat out. Changed priorities, changed hobbies, stuff like that. Some for good, some for bad, some inevitable, but they happened. So i've adapted..to myself? Odd that i would have to, but i do, so i did. Blabbering seems to be the theme of this, so i'll continue. I've had a new found love for tetris and ska music. They both tend to blow mind, you should try 'em out. My sisters in Italy. I'm sure she's having loads of fun being all life-experience-esk and such, but i miss her. No one to be with at family functions! But anyways, i'm going to watch tv and stuff. Nice talking to you again mr. blog.

Pass the Prompt

Alright this is for all you Perrin Nerds out there. Keep your mind racing while your away from room 96.

Heres some guidelines to hopefully make this a successful and fun-filled experience :D

-Make prompt thought provoking
-Make prompt controversial, but not offensive to anyone
-Try and make the topic something most, if not everyone, can relate to
-Put questions that everyone can think about while thinking of how to respond
-Don't put people down, Arguing is awesome, not meanness
-Idea for passing the Promt, i could get everyones name on a peice of paper and just pick from a hat to pass the prompt. Just a thought.

These are just my ideas, i wrote this in band, so comment any objections or suggestions we can use. Majority will rule in this blog, no dictatorships, or there will be trouble.

Your fellow Perrin-mate,
J$

P.S. - there is the possiblity of multiple spelling/grammar errors. Beware. Cuidado.

Close your eyes just settle, settle.

I don't really know where this is gonna go, but i feel the need to blog. I'll just talk. Well Myriah just left, early. again. GAY. But she's still awesome :D Right. Well i just thought of something to talk about, the other day i was thinking about the serenity prayer, because the first line is "lord grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change" because well ya know some stuff happened that i couldn't control, but it was really annoying. So i decided that if i realize the things that are, and always will be inevitable, and just accept them, and make the best of them, then life will be much easier. Not saying my life is difficult, but that would just help alot. I think if we all learned to do that then it would just make things so much less complicated. But many of the things that are inevitable are the actions of others, such as parents being parents. Being protective and what not, there's not really anything you can do about it, so why not accept it, and make the best of it. I think i'm going to continue on with this thinking. See how that goes. And i can go from there.
-jake

I'm not really sure what i want to say. But i need to say something.

I don't know where i want to go. But me feet keep going anyway.

Clueless as to where i lead, i'm just following my steps

What do i really want, that's a question i cannot answer

I keep telling myself everythings great, when i know i'm lying.

Can it really get better? Or are my hopes just too high?

I told myself i wouldn't settle, did i keep my word?

I don't know if i'm making myself believe this, or if it's true.

Help my God, straighten out my path

My eyes are closed, but the sun is shining.

How can i see the sun? I need to see it.

I cannot continue living with this darkness of settling

I must find if this is real, or if i'm just pretending

Why do i always question my thoughts? What happened to my trust of myself?

A New Begining

A new beggining seems to be what everyone is talking about these days. Obviously, the marking of a New Year just passed. I never really got how just because it's a new day, it's a new year, therefor it makes it easier for a new beggining? But i think that is something to do with hope. That since the calender says that it's a new year, that it gives you a reason to change. A clean slate, so to speak.
I never really stick to my New Years resolutions. Like everyone. But i think it's because i never really have one. Now i'm not planning on one this year either. But i did have some sort of a realization lately.
Well the passed few weeks i was not really myself. I was depressed. I kept telling myself that i wasn't, but i was. Now i still can't say i know the true reason for it. It's gone now though. I feel like myself again, i'm happy, enthusiastic, and just start the day with a smile saying "I'm gonna have a good day!" I don't really know why i have these little spurts of depression. But my goal for the New Year, is to avoid them. Or if i come upon them, to find the reason. And dispose of it. Or resolve it. That is my goal.

Next Thursday

I had a converstation with my grandpa last night. It went something like this, it took place on a Wednesday.

"Hey i have a band concert this Thursday, well i guess, tomorrow." - Me

"Oh you mean next Thursday?" - PopPop [grandpa]

"No i mean tomorrow" - Me

"Well that is next thursday." - PopPop

"Oh is it? then when is this Thursday?" - Me

"Well i'm not sure, when do you think?" - PopPop

"Wouldn't this Thursday only exist if it actually is Thursday?" - Me

"The world may never know. But see that's how people talk." - PopPop

"You're right, why can't they just say, the Thursday of the week following this week?" - Me

I've never really took the way i said things into consideration, because i've realized that alot of things are like that. It's just intreresting. Then sometimes seeing how that phrase has progressed though history is cool too. Like i was...well, i was "doing my buisness" and i said "howdy" to myself. Don't ask me why. So then i thought, who the heck one day just said howdy? And i thought about it. It sounds like "How do you do?" and you always hear cowboys saying that, and who says howdy? Cowboys. So i think that it was something along those lines, when someone said "Howdy do?" because that sounds extrememly like how do you do. Just my guess. But i thought it was interesting. Sweet.

-Jacob

Whatever tomorrow brings, i'll be there

Lately i've been having bad dreams. I've had some of death, some of being chased, and attacked. I also had a dream and i woke up crying. I don't know why. Also, a few days ago, i realized that i haven't cried in too long it seems. I don't know why. But it seems like it need it. I just continually have this feeling that something horrible is going to happen. I don't know why. I just hope i'm prepared for whatever it is. I think that's why i'm scared, because i don't think i'm going to be ready for it. I'll just live day to day till it happens.
-Jacob